What would George Carlin say about Basketball vs. Baseball?

Here's what comedian George Carlin might have said.

                                BASEBALL vs. BASKETBALL

The baseball uniform looks like a formal outfit, something you might wear to church. 

The basketball uniform looks like a bathing suit, something you might wear to the pool.

Baseball is played on green grass.

Basketball is played on a beige hardwood floor.

Baseball looks like a battlefield, with a few soldiers trying to pass through enemy territory. 

Basketball looks like a dance floor, with couples trying to decide who they should dance with next.

Every baseball park is different.

Every basketball court is the same.

In short, baseball comes out of 19th-century pastoral America. Basketball comes out of 20th-century office culture.

__________

Now For Some Analysis

I view George Carlin as a great comedian (and, yes, anthropologist), but I don't buy his famous riff's depiction of baseball as wimpy. As former Commissioner Giamatti once said, baseball consists of a man standing on a hill throwing a rock at a man below him holding a club.

Lately I'm even thinking that baseball might have gained popularity in 18th-century America due to its emotional resonance with organized violence: pistol duels and the line warfare of the American Civil War. In both arenas, there was a masculine code of honor that required the courage to stand there while someone shot at you from close range.

Regardless of historical origins, baseball clearly has violence at its core, but the violence has been ritualized and made into art—like a movie fight scene with sweet music in the background that makes you feel something beautiful is transpiring, or a ballet where punches are thrown, but nobody connects with the opposing ballerina's chin.

Still, baseball doesn't dance the same way basketball does. Ballet with actors spread around the stage (baseball) is not the same as 5 couples dancing close together and constantly switching partners (basketball). Basketball seems to come more out of the delicate communication dynamics of the early 21st-century American office: fast-paced, lots of teamwork and immediate, visible rewards, all played out under florescent lights and clean indoor spaces. Unlike baseball, the allegorical background in basketball is less the battlefield (even less farmlands) and more the modern workplace.

Sometimes I think I'm getting closer to understanding the cultural meaning of baseball and basketball, and other times I feel like I'm just staring at crop circles or the Inca lines around Cuzco, and I'm not sure what any of it means. As Carlin said, "I just want to go home! I hope I'll be safe at home!"

Related Posts:
What's the connection between moonlight and baseball?

Football and Basketball as American Rituals

What's the cultural meaning of the slide and catch in baseball?

All my posts about baseball and Field of Dreams